Roger Clemens - Like Sands Through the Hour Glass . . .

Is Roger Clemens the gift that keeps on giving? Watching his life unfold on the internet and through the NY tabloids is like watching a train wreck - you can't help looking, staring, and being thankful that it's not you in the rear-view mirror.

The amazing thing is . . . All he had to do was speak to George Mitchell when he was originally asked and tell the truth!

During his first press conference about the Mitchell Report, Clemens said that he didn't know what Mitchell wanted to talk to him about. Um, Roger... it's a steroid investigation, what do you think they want to talk to you about?

Since his "I'm not talking to anybody" stance, his career and reputation has been stuck swirling around this performance enhancing drug toilet bowl. And now his lawsuit against Brian McNamee is plunging everything from the bowels of Clemens' past.

First there was the country music star - oh and she was 15 when they met!

Then the NY Daily News linked Roger to a few other pinstripe huggers in Manhattan.

And today there is John Daly's ex wife! The Daily News and SI.com have stories about Roger and Mrs. ex-John Daly traveling the country and dancing with boa constrictors! What's next? Roger dancing with just a boa?!

We need to find Dan Duquette and get his reaction!

The only thing missing from this bad day-time soap opera is Paris Hilton, Rupaul, and a bowl of salsa. Lets see what happens next week on Clemens' very own Wisteria Lane!